My brother just came out to me, I out come men who like chill
I came out to my mom when I was 23, thinking she would embrace me with open arms. After crying for what felt like an eternity, my mom told me that I was just inexperienced with girls and that she would pay a prostitute to turn me into a real man.
She stopped halfway through the stack of envelopes and catalogs. He blessed them with and they threw him out like trash, at a time where he probably needed their support more than ever. Your openness and willingness to share will pave the way for those who will one day walk this path. For you. Please no times are changing…. So sad that it had to be that traumatic for you all.
I started to feel angry. But, I always knew that however bad I had it, my brother had it worse. I was just happy to hear his voice, until I heard that he was crying. I feel myself an ally of LGBT. She said she needed to talk to me and I followed her to my room. Your life inspire me!
We live in a day and age where it is more acceptable to be different yet there is still such a stigma in so many ways and I think it is because the Bible says that being gay is a sin. I was supposed to meet with her once a week. She made my brother tell me himself over the phone that he was gay. She retreated to her bedroom and closed the door. And when i read your story about your brother it brought tears to my eyes and i can see the loving person you are in your words. But, at some point when I was feeling like he thought that his coming out affected only him.
Dear therapist: my parents won’t let me tell my brother i’m gay
Something life changing had happened, or was happening. I look just to reading more in the future from you. for some resources. Either my mom was too busy for that or she let us get our own opinions. And, it did. But the bible also says you can sell your daughter into slavery, working on the Sabbath is a sin, planting different crops side by side can get you stoned. Before her death a year and a half ago, my mom cried to me and told me that she felt like a failure as a mother because of her reaction when my brother came out.
Hours earlier I had been making out with my boyfriend when we had the house to ourselves. I just hope I never have to love a televangelist…. So in some ways your mom needs to get cut some slack. If we could just learn to love our come man and not try and force our beliefs on others this world would finally find peace across every border.
Weeks before she died she told my brother in words on a card. I will never understand conservative Christians. Thank you so much for sharing! So because of my experience I never want to wish it on another person. I followed! For your brother. Welcome to the new age! What did my brother coming out have to do with my sexuality? Just this Saturday, when I was at Oceanside Pride, I met a wonderful young man, no yet 20, with clear out, no guile, and a ton of confident integrity, who has just moved in with his boyfriend, suddenly, from clear across the country, Florida, because his parents searched his phone and finding his live messages to his boyfriend, kicked him out of the house and their lives.
Clearly, sadly they are mentally blind to the wonder that is their son. There seems to be a lot of love and support between you two. As a black African I know what exclusion means because as a black person I was excluded throughout my life because of my race even in church there were churches for white people only and churches for black people only in Rhodesia then.
I came up with nothing that would warrant my mother putting on a sweatsuit. I needed him to know that it affected me too. Excellent post. I do however know a young man that is gay that is a good friend of my youngest son and he is a wonderful young man.
While the Bible was inspired by God it was humans who decided what was going to be the final acceptable text which is what we have now. She came around. Only one of us could be gay and my brother had clearly already called dibs. Like it was a punishment. I feel better seeking justice and being a lawyer myself, i cant help but feeling disgusted for the way it was understood and is understand to be gay back then and now.
I never asked what was correct if male with male or male with female or female with female was ok to raise. This is not a choice these children make. I do live with a gay friend and i respect him and love him like my own blood brother. The right way to come out is different for every person.
Hi Lori, A very moving post I could not help but shed a tear not about your brother being gay but for the pain you all went through. My children have always accepted him for who he is and for that I am very proud. I refused — leading my mother to firmly believe that she had failed as a parent. I am a Christian believer myself who continue to grapple with human sexuality. I cried too; not because he was gay, but because he was in pain. She started talking in a tone that was forced calm, measured calm, scary calm.
Great help from your aunt. Im super lucky as my whole family is loving and supportive of me being gay but i have friends who are not as lucky. Wow, that makes me so glad mine came and sat down with us in the lounge and told us.
What to do when you learn a brother/sister is gay
Great book as is yours, Lori! Being gay is not a disease, being gay is not bad it is not a sin, they must be respected and be treated the same way. I sat in silent revolt. I was sitting at the dining room table doing homework with my boyfriend when my mom came home from work and started opening the mail. After she walked out the door, my boyfriend and I stared at each other without speaking. I have committed myself to understand how God wants us to deal with questions about human sexuality. The scary calm was fading, now she was just scary.
For your mother. I am so sorry. At a PFLAG meeting I attended the majority of the parents reported that their adolescent children communicated that they were transgender was through a text. That was never right in my understanding because God is the one who created me black I do not believe that he did that so that I can live a life of exclusion.
I am sorry that you lost your mum I pray that you and your brother can be happy with each other. I braced myself.
I heard yelling and crying all night. Your honest raw vulnerability shows and builds your foundation of strength.
Lgbt coming-out considerations: how siblings factor in
If him being gay forced my mom into a sweatsuit, I could only imagine what me being gay would force her into. I racked my brain trying to think of what the letter could possibly say. Christ reached out to those who were being excluded because of race, gender culture and desease to just mention a few. People pick and chose what parts of the bible best suit them and the rest be damned. I can see why your brother chose to come out via a letter! When I got home from school she told me to get in the car immediately because I had an appointment to see a therapist.
What i wish my parents had said when i came out as gay
I do not believe that the Christian faith is about exclusion on whatever grounds because that is the thing Christ challenged and died for. The relationships that my mom had with each of us as individuals and together as a sibling unit were never the same.
She went up to her room and came back down wearing a sweatsuit and said she was going for a walk. Then, for an hour, she told me what the bible said about gay people. For my brother it was in a mailed letter. That physical feeling of relief when I read she sent him a card saying she wished she had done better…. The therapist told me not to tell anybody that my brother was gay.
Gosh that makes me so sad. They make excuses for pedophiles while hating gays. My brother came out when I was in high school and he was in his early twenties. She taught me how to pray for my brother so that he might see the error in his ways, ask for forgiveness and, once again, lead a godly life. Im thankful for that. What a fantastic read.